How to Get Connected and Make Friends at Church

Attending church can be a meaningful place to grow spiritually and find community, but it can also feel intimidating to build relationships—especially if you’re new. Here are practical, welcoming steps to help you get connected and make friends at church.

Show up regularly

Consistency matters. Attending services, small groups, or events on a regular basis helps others recognize you and gives you repeated opportunities to interact. Even if you can’t attend every week, aim for steady involvement so relationships have time to develop.

Introduce yourself

Start simple: offer a friendly smile, a handshake, or a brief “Hi, I’m [Name]” before or after services. Many people are just as glad someone else reached out. If your church has a welcome area or hospitality team, stop by and share your interests or questions.

Join a small group or Sunday school

Small groups, life groups, or Sunday school classes are where deeper friendships form. These settings provide regular, smaller-scale interaction and time for conversation, prayer, and mutual support. Look for groups organized by life stage, interest, or location.

Serve with others

Serving together builds camaraderie quickly. Find a volunteer role that fits your gifts—ushering, children’s ministry, hospitality, outreach, worship team, or facility care. Serving removes pressure to be “on” socially and creates shared purpose.

Be curious and listen

When you meet someone, ask open questions and listen more than you talk. Good conversation starters:

• “How long have you been coming here?”

• “What drew you to this church?”

• “Are you involved in any groups or ministries?” Follow up on details people share—remembering names, family details, or hobbies shows you care.

Invite and follow up

Take initiative to move beyond brief encounters:

• Invite someone to coffee or a church event.

• Ask a family over for a casual meal or a park playdate.

• Follow up with a text or message: “It was great meeting you—would you like to grab coffee next week?” People appreciate invitations; many want connection but are hesitant to initiate.

Attend social and outreach events

Community meals, potlucks, service projects, and seasonal events are lower-pressure ways to meet people across the church. These activities often bring out people’s natural warmth and create shared memories.

Be patient and consistent

Friendships take time. Expect gradual progress rather than instant closeness. Keep showing up, keep reaching out, and be consistent in how you engage.

Respect boundaries and diversity

Church community includes people with varied backgrounds, personalities, and boundaries. Be sensitive to different social needs—some prefer deep conversation right away, others open up slowly. Respect schedules, family commitments, and personal space.

Use digital tools wisely

If your church uses a directory, Facebook group, or messaging platform, use it to stay informed and reach out. Online groups can be a useful bridge to in-person connection, but don’t let them replace face-to-face time.

Bring others along

Meeting people is easier in groups. Invite a friend, neighbor, or coworker to join you—introducing someone new can create natural conversation and broaden your circle.

Making friends at church is a combination of presence, initiative, service, and patience. Start with one or two steps that feel manageable—regular attendance, a small group, or a volunteer role—and build from there. Your openness and willingness to invest will not only deepen your own faith journey but help others feel welcomed as well.

If you’re in the New Cumberland area and looking for a welcoming community, come visit Fairview BIC—we’d love to meet you and help you find the right group or service to get involved.

Why Church Attendance Still Matters

In an era of digital connection, on-demand content, and increasingly busy schedules, many people question whether regular church attendance still matters. For Fairview BIC and many communities like ours in New Cumberland, the answer is a clear yes. Church attendance continues to offer spiritual, relational, and practical benefits that are difficult to replicate online or on your own.

Spiritual Formation Happens in Community

Spiritual growth is not only an individual pursuit. Regularly attending worship services, Bible studies, and prayer gatherings provides structure and rhythm for faith. Corporate worship shapes our theology, reinforces scripture, and helps move belief into practice. Hearing God’s Word preached, participating in sacraments, and praying together deepen spiritual formation in ways private devotion rarely does.

Shared Worship Strengthens Faith

Worshiping together creates a powerful sense of awe, encouragement, and accountability. When people sing, pray, and respond together, faith becomes tangible and contagious. Seeing others live out their faith provides real-world examples and encouragement during seasons of doubt or struggle.

Authentic Community and Meaningful Relationships

Church is one of the few places intentionally designed for building long-term, intergenerational relationships. Regular attendance fosters friendships that carry through life’s highs and lows—births, illnesses, job changes, grief. These relationships provide emotional support, practical help, and mutual encouragement that social media connections rarely sustain.

Service and Mission Are More Effective Together

When people gather, they identify needs and combine gifts to serve the neighborhood and beyond. Churches coordinate food drives, volunteer teams, counseling, and local outreach with greater organization and continuity than ad hoc efforts. Attendance helps members discover their gifts and plug into service in ways that transform both giver and recipient.

Formation of Character and Responsibility

Consistent involvement in church life cultivates virtues like humility, patience, forgiveness, and generosity. Being part of a faith community means holding one another accountable in love and learning how to navigate conflict, reconcile differences, and serve sacrificially. These practices shape character over time.

Multigenerational Faith Transmission

Families passing faith to children benefit greatly from regular church participation. Children learn the rhythms of worship, hear scripture explained in age-appropriate ways, and see adults practicing faith consistently. Intergenerational settings allow younger people to learn from older believers and vice versa, preserving traditions and adapting them to today’s needs.

Mental and Emotional Well-Being

Research consistently links involvement in faith communities with better mental health outcomes: lower rates of loneliness, greater life satisfaction, and stronger coping mechanisms in crisis. Rituals, shared narratives, and supportive relationships all contribute to emotional resilience.

Accountability and Healthy Discipline

Attendance creates a framework for spiritual disciplines—regular prayer, scripture reading, service, and confession—supported by others. It's easier to maintain spiritual practices when they’re embedded in communal rhythms like weekly worship, small groups, and service projects.

A Public Witness to Community

Gathering visibly communicates hope, care, and commitment to the wider community. Churches that show up consistently—through worship, service, and presence—demonstrate tangible love for their neighborhoods. That public witness often opens doors for conversation and service that private faith cannot.

Adaptability and Presence in Times of Need

When crises hit, congregations that meet regularly are better positioned to mobilize resources quickly—emergency meals, counseling, childcare, or financial assistance. The presence of an already-connected community means faster and more effective responses in times of personal or communal hardship.

Practical Suggestions for Staying Connected

• Prioritize a weekly gathering: treat it as a calendar commitment rather than optional.

• Join a small group or Bible class for deeper relationships and study.

• Volunteer in a ministry that matches your gifts—serving builds belonging.

• Bring others with you—inviting a neighbor or friend is an easy way to extend community.

• Balance online and in-person engagement: streaming is helpful, but be intentional about face-to-face involvement.

Church attendance remains a vital part of Christian life—not out of obligation, but because it nurtures faith, relationships, service, and resilience in ways that individual efforts alone cannot. At Fairview BIC, we welcome people at every stage of faith to come, belong, and grow together. Regular participation in a faithful community strengthens both individuals and the neighborhood we serve.

Now what?

Last month we answered the question “what happens when I die”. Along with the answer, we learned that there was a requirement before eternal life can be claimed.

What do I need to do?

A very familiar Bible verse tells us. John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”

The one and only Son declared in this verse is Jesus Christ. Jesus came to earth for one reason: to die on the cross. Why did Jesus have to die? Now that is a very good question and it takes us back to the beginning of time with Adam and Eve. When our ancestors chose to disobey God in the Garden of Eden, sin entered the world and the human heart. Sin is defined as any thought, attitude, or action against God’s laws or character. The result of sin is a damaged relationship with God. Sin caused a divide between Him and the man He created. In order for us to be reconciled to God and have a relationship again, sin must be dealt with. Mankind can not deal with it because of our inborn sin nature. There had to be another way: Enter Jesus. Jesus came to earth as a baby, lived a perfect sinless life, and died on a cross to save all of mankind from their sin. That means Jesus took sin, all sin, even yours and mine, onto his own body and died the death all sinful mankind deserved. On the third day after his crucifixion, God raised Jesus from the grave of the dead to the glory of eternal life. Sin was dealt with by the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. A relationship with God forever is now possible.

So, what do I need to do?

The Bible passage in Romans, chapter 10, verse 9 tells us very plainly what to do. “That if you declare with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved.”

Believe that Jesus took your personal sin on his body. Believe that he died for you. Believe that he suffered the cross in your place. Believe that he was raised from the dead to life eternal by God. Believe with your heart and pray it with your voice to the one true God and eternal life is yours.

Here is a sample prayer: “Lord Jesus, I am a sinner. I believe you died for my sins so I can be forgiven. I receive you as my Lord and Savior. Thank you for coming into my life.”

If you have prayed this prayer in true belief and faith, please contact us! We would love to send you resources to help you in your new faith walk.

How can I have a relationship with God when I can’t pray the right way?

I had an interesting question asked to me from a harried and hurried mother as she was trying to fit a Bible Study into her day. Her question was this, “How can I have a relationship with God when I can’t pray the right way?”

Answering a question with a question isn’t really a good response, but I did anyway. “What is praying the right way?”, I asked. “You know, on your knees, in the quiet, without distraction,” she said.

So, to be clear, I restated her concern. “You feel you do not have an intimate relationship with God because you don’t have time to pray in a prescribed way?” She answers in the affirmative.

Are there some of you that have that same concern? Let me give you three ways to develop your prayer life and the intimacy with God that you desire.

Let me confirm that God hears your prayers regardless of the time, place, or position you are in. We have a God who never tunes us out or turns us off. He wants to communicate with you always.

The first way is to communicate from your heart. Move into God’s presence and stay there. Talk to Him honestly about your love, joy, anger, confusion, burdens, and busyness.

Secondly, talk to God habitually throughout the day. Say simple prayers of a few words or sentences. Understand the need to stay in contact with Him. Thirdly, pray in the ordinary. Your day has a routine. Talk to God during the rhythm and flows of daily life. He cares about each moment of your life.

God wants a closer relationship with you and prayer is our way of building that relationship. Try building these three elements into your life and look for the blessings it brings.

What happens when I die?

Before we talk about death, let’s talk about life, specifically how we were created. God created all humanity with three components: body, spirit, and soul. The physical body is material in that it can cease to exist. There is an endpoint to its life. The spirit/soul are immaterial because they are eternal, or have no endpoint of existence.

The body consists of the external and internal parts that function together to keep us alive on earth. They are physical and can be seen. The soul can not be seen physically but is known as our life, mind, and will; our inner self. In other words, they represent who we really are in mental, moral, and social likeness. The spirit is that part of our being that remains actively participating with the Holy Spirit. It is known as our God-consciousness or spiritual self.

Is everybody good? Okay, now to answer the question. What happens when I die?

When the physical body breaths out its last breath, the body and soul/spirit part ways. The body begins to deteriorate and turns to dust. However, God calls the body, at this time, in a state of “sleep”. The Bible passage of First Corinthians 15:51,52 says, “Listen, I tell you a mystery: We shall not all sleep (state of body death), but we will be changed- in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable (unable to die), and we will be changed.” So, our bodies, even though they are breaking down, will be made new again. That is God’s promise.

Our soul/spirit is in the presence of God the minute the body expires. Our inner being immediately goes to Heaven to live with the Lord forever. A Bible passage in Second Corinthians 5:6 tells us about the Apostle Paul’s view on death. He says, “Therefore. we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body, we are away from the Lord.” Paul distinguishes his mortal body from his soul/spirit. His desire is to be with Jesus and he will be when his body ceases to exist.

So, this is what God promises: when we die our soul/spirit goes to be with Him. There will be a future time when our bodies will be made new and rejoin our soul/spirit. This is an eternal condition.

BUT, there is a requirement for this to be true for you. Come back next month to learn what we have to do to gain this eternal condition.